How the two go hand in hand
Abandonment issues by far are something I see plague people who are battling addiction, suffer from substance use disorder or are in recovery more than anything else in the conversations I have with people fighting to take back control of their lives. As we often discuss and I’ve mentioned previously in this blog, trauma is the initiator for most addictions.
We at Believe detox center facilitate a multitude of different support groups covering different topics that often impact people battling substance use disorder and one topic we always make time for is abandonment. A lot of us are grieving people that we felt have left us. When this happens it becomes confusing for someone leaving them with certain negative thoughts that can trigger addiction or relapse.
The topic is deep. Many people in active addiction are dealing with feelings of abandonment that occured when they were a child. Maybe a parent left the house, an older relative passed away like a grandmother or more. Either way, usually this is the time where most people with substance use disorder discuss beginning traumas that they carry with them into the present.
The feelings that one feels during what is actually or is just being perceived as an act of abandonment vary. One may be confused, hurt, lost, depressed or more. Even feelings of inadequacy can creep in when a person thinks that they weren’t good enough for the other person to stick around. This can also cause issues as for a person who may be finding trouble building new relationships. They may enter these new relationships, friendships, etc with the pre disposition that the person is going to leave anyways.
It’s especially important for those with substance use disorder to process these feelings and acknowledge that one persons actions in the past don’t necessarily add up to another persons actions today. When one doesn’t, these feeling can fester and possibly trigger relapse, loss of support or more, but how does one go about doing so…
Well, honesty is key in recovery to say the least. It’s important to acknowledge and build a healing dialogue around feelings and circumstances that aren’t beneficial to your recovery and sobriety. Find safe spaces to process the negative emotions that are attached to triggers at times, don’t become so overwhelmed by things that occurred in the past that they cause things in the present that aren’t conducive to your overall sobriety and peace of mind.
You are not alone or on a rock far away when it comes to feelings of abandonment. You are like many and that’s why it’s important to find the support you need so you can go forward and not backward in your journey. We are here to support you taking that first step and beyond and will help you process traumas in the past that will help you strengthen your recovery foundation going forward.
